Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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