Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
