Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
