Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
