lets start a swedish sibling band together
so let's talk penis.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
