found the other keg... it's in the tree
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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