Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
