Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
