i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
