highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
