I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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