I would go down on you faster than GM stock
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Randomize
