I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
