On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Pooping to opera.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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