I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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