just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
