doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Randomize
