I hate your face
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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