She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
