Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
