There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
she told me i tasted like america
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
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