My liver just broke up with me...
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
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