did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
