oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
