Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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