At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
