Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
