Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Even my vagina gasped.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Randomize