i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
