its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
