you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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