Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
