i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
