What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
