Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Ketchup is God's man juice
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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