her vagine was all disorganized.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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