I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
