OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize
