I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Randomize
