I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize