CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
