Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
