please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Please don't give away my fajitas
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize