Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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