So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
