I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Randomize
