You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
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