I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
