The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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