so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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