I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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