we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize