please come you make the beer taste better
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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