I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
